Rachel
House flies and bluer skies
Whilst at work the other day, I was trying to focus on a fairly data-heavy task when a huge house fly came into the room through a crack...
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TODAY, I WOKE UP FEELING ANGRY ABOUT HUMMUS
Irrational and farcical musings in anorexia recovery.
20th September 2020
Today I woke up, and I felt angry. Why? Because hummus. Yes, hummus. Not because I'm particularly offended by chickpeas. But, because I am currently in recovery from an anorexia relapse, and these are the sorts of irrational, absurd, and comical things that plague my conscience most days.
I've 'ummed' and 'ahhed' about writing about my struggle with anorexia this time. I've done that in long times past, and it often ended up being more stressful than relieving. Therefore, this blog isn't going to be particularly deep, reflective, or poignant. I do enough of that sort of thing in therapy. I am not setting any goals or expectations on how frequently I'll post. This blog is simply designed to be a place where I document some of the most strange and comical thoughts and happenings in my current battle with 'the woman upstairs', and try to, somehow, make sense of them. This blog isn't designed to be particularly inspiring, educational, or agenda-seeking. The idea is simply to give insight to those who've not experienced an eating disorder on the kind of things this illness does to someone's brain, and to hopefully add a knowing and understanding smile to the faces of those of you who just know exactly what I'm talking about.
In no way do I intend to trivialise this illness, or downplay the importance of pro-recovery material and education on the horrific nature and realities of eating disorders. I am simply a believer in the immense value of humour when it comes to healing, and this is how I'm choosing to engage you, and the world, in my current journey.
With love, Rach x
"A cheerful heart is good medicine..." ~ Proverbs 17:22
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